What to Do in the First Week After a Loss: A Gentle, Practical Guide

When someone close to you dies, the world doesn't stop — but it feels like it should. The first week is a blur of emotions, phone calls, and decisions you never expected to make. It can feel overwhelming, and most people have no idea where to begin.

This guide is here to help. It won't rush you. It won't tell you how to feel. It will simply walk you through what actually needs to happen in the first few days, and reassure you that a lot of things can wait.

The First 24 Hours

Get a medical certificate of cause of death

If your loved one died in hospital, the hospital will arrange this. If they died at home, their GP or the out-of-hours service will need to be contacted to confirm the death and issue the certificate. If the death was sudden, unexpected, or the cause is unclear, it may be referred to a coroner — this is routine and nothing to worry about.

Contact a funeral director

You don't need to do this immediately, but many people find it helpful to make contact early. A good funeral director will guide you through next steps and can take care of a lot of the logistics. You don't have to commit to anything straight away — an initial phone call is enough.

Tell close family and friends

Start with the people closest to you and work outward. You don't have to tell everyone at once. It's absolutely fine to ask someone you trust to help spread the word. A short message or phone call is all that's needed — there's no perfect script for this.

Take a breath

This might sound obvious, but it's worth saying: you don't have to do everything today. Make sure you eat something, drink some water, and try to rest, even if sleep feels impossible. The practical tasks will still be there tomorrow.

Days Two to Four

Register the death

In England and Wales, a death must be registered within five days at the local register office. You'll need the medical certificate of cause of death and, if possible, the person's birth certificate, marriage certificate, and NHS number. The registrar will issue you a green form (needed for burial or cremation) and certified copies of the death certificate — it's worth ordering several, as banks, solicitors, and other organisations will need them.

Start notifying key organisations

You'll need to let several organisations know about the death. In the early days, focus on the most urgent ones: the person's bank (to prevent fraud on their accounts), their employer, their landlord or mortgage provider, and the Department for Work and Pensions if they were receiving benefits.

The government's Tell Us Once service can notify multiple government departments in a single step — the registrar will give you details about this when you register the death.

Begin planning the funeral

If you've contacted a funeral director, they'll help with this. Key decisions include whether to choose a burial or cremation, the date and venue, and whether you'd like a religious or non-religious service. Don't feel pressured to finalise everything immediately — most funerals take place within two to three weeks.

Check for a will

If you know where the person kept important documents, have a look for a will. This will help clarify their wishes and identify any appointed executors. If you can't find one, a solicitor may hold a copy, or you can search the National Will Register.

Days Five to Seven

Notify utility providers and subscription services

Contact energy companies, broadband providers, mobile phone networks, and any subscription services like streaming platforms. Some of these will need a copy of the death certificate. Our guide on cancelling utilities and subscriptions after a death covers this in detail.

Secure the property

If the person lived alone, make sure their home is secure. Check that doors and windows are locked, redirect post if possible, and let neighbours know. You may also want to contact the home insurer to let them know the property is unoccupied.

Start thinking about finances

This doesn't need to be fully sorted in the first week, but it's helpful to start getting an overview. Gather any paperwork you can find — bank statements, pension documents, insurance policies. If you're the executor of the estate, you'll eventually need to apply for probate, but that can wait. Our guide to probate explains the process in plain English.

What Can Wait

Not everything needs to happen in the first week. Give yourself permission to leave these for later:

Sorting through personal belongings is something many people feel pressure to do quickly, but there's no rush. Take your time, and only start when you feel ready.

Closing all financial accounts can happen over the coming weeks and months. Most banks will freeze an account once notified of a death, which protects against fraud in the meantime.

Dealing with social media accounts is important but not urgent. Our guide on notifying social media companies can help when you're ready.

Making big personal decisions — like selling a house, changing jobs, or moving — should be avoided in the early weeks of grief if at all possible. Give yourself time before making any life-changing choices.

Be Kind to Yourself

The first week after losing someone is one of the hardest things most people will ever go through. If you forgot to eat, if you couldn't make a phone call, if you spent a whole day on the sofa — that's okay. There is no right way to do this.

Ask for help when you need it. Accept it when it's offered. And remember: the practical tasks are important, but they're not more important than you.

If you need support navigating what comes next, Passage is here to guide you through — one step at a time.